Thankful? You Bet!

Today is Brandon's 9th birthday, and tomorrow is Thanksgiving Day. We are in Central Louisiana, visiting with Kendra's mom. It will be the first time we have celebrated any holiday with her, and although Brandon was born in Louisiana, it is the first time we have celebrated his birthday in our native state.

I am very thankful for the life I have; for the family and friends that I share it with. I am thankful for God's hand in my life, for His Mercy and compassion, for His unwavering faithfulness, for His willingness to put up with me and the patience He gives the aforementioned family and friends for them to put up with me as well, and for being willing to use me on occasion in spite of my limitations and shortcomings.

In 10 days our current church parish will have also have a celebration; a grand one at that. We will celebrate the Rite of Dedication for our new church building. For years, even before we arrived in 2005, our parish has been preparing for this day. I am thankful for the parishioners who have dedicated countless hours to planning, organizing, informing, contributing, praying, etc. throughout this effort.

I am thankful that my children and all other children in our parish will finally experience the joy of worshiping God in such a place. I am thankful for the opportunity our parish has to renew the dedication of our own hearts and the catechetical opportunity before us as well. I am thankful for the priests who have constantly and consistently reminded us that this building of the Church in our hearts is the most important.

I am thankful to belong to the Universal Church, to be nourished by her Sacraments, and for the Groom Who has given His life for her; for me.

Parents Are Not Perfick

My son Brandon (8) began taking karate instruction in November. He's really doing great, and I am impressed with his intensity and ability to learn so quickly. I'm most impressed with his ability to remain focused.

Brandon is a wonderful boy, does very well in school, and has a super golden heart. He's also what I would call "all-out BOY", and in most things outside of school-work it is difficult for him to "be still" long enough to completely take in the moment.

As I suspect most dads do, I want Brandon to be successful. I want him to be the best that he can be at whatever he does. Brandon and I have been working on his karate at home, and I see that it is really helping him. What's more important though is that Brandon can see that it's helping him. I know this because yesterday there was a transition in the nature of our home practice.

Previously, it has been difficult for Brandon to achieve the same level of focus and intensity at home as he displays in karate class. But not yesterday. I could see the concentration as he went through his patterns, and as he practiced his punches and kicks. I knew that the praises of his karate instructors during class had convinced him that our practices at home were effective. The one problem? He kept taking his eyes off of his "target" to look at me. He did this repeatedly, though I admonished him several times.

And all at once it hit me. My son just wanted to please his dad. He wanted me to be happy with his performance. I could see it in his face. I could feel it in his eyes. He knew that I was looking for perfection from him.

Oh oh. Perfection; I've blogged about that before. Did I fail at family again? Were my expectations of perfection from Brandon negatively affecting his desire to continue karate or possibly even damaging our relationship?

I try to remain conscious of how our relationship will continue to shape Brandon's understanding of the relationship he is called to have with God, his real Father; OUR real Father. In doing so though, I always learn more than I teach.

I pulled Brandon close to me, hugged him, and told him, "I know you're just trying to please me. I want you to know that I am very proud of you, and it pleases me just to know that you want to please me; and I always love you. Do the best you can, and let me help you to do better."

There's no problem with striving for perfection. In fact, God wants perfection from us as well (Matthew 5:48). I am far from a perfect dad, and that is never more evident than when I complete an examination of conscience. But after the Sacrament of Reconciliation, I hear Him reassure me:

"It pleases me just to know that you want to please me; and I always love you. Do the best you can, and let me help you to do better."