Learning to Pray (Moving past goo goo, ga ga)

In "Learning to Pray (An Introduction)" we began to look at prayer at a very basic level, from the perspective of an infant who is learning to communicate with his or her parents through non-verbal means and defined Christian prayer as relationship with Christ.

In the pursuit of education, one's ability to understand and expound that which is learned is made possible by a gradual development of the curriculum. As this development continues, the learner is best served by occasional reviews which reinforce what has been learned and further enables the learner to continually progress in his or her studies.

The same is true with the formation of faith and prayer. This is not to suggest that the approach to these should be undertaken in a merely academic manner. Again, prayer is relationship with Christ. We are not just seeking to know about Him, but rather to KNOW Him.

And yet, when one sets out to know someone, if that person is really important to him or her, does he or she not seek to learn all that is possible about that person? If you have ever been in a relationship with someone, and that relationship was very important to you, then you understand.

So it is with our relationship with Christ and our understanding of prayer as we continue.

While the infant and parents begin to love each other through non-verbal means of communication, the development of that relationship is enhanced as the infant learns to speak.

At first it begins with "Goo goo, ga ga." Both the infant and the parents have no idea what those sounds are, but those sounds serve to reinforce the love that has already been substantiated in the relationship.

Gradually, the child forms the ability to enunciate a word or two.

How special must it be for that child as he or she realizes that its parents understand him or her! Likewise, the proud and loving parents embrace the child's limited ability to verbally communicate.

Stay with me on this baby thing, there is a purpose here.

How does the child learn to speak? The parents have spent a considerable amount of time speaking to him or her, especially focusing on those important words, "Mommy" and "Daddy."

“This is how you are to pray: Our Father..." - Matthew 6: 9

What joy the parents experience with the simple yet beautiful music of their child's voice speaking their name! What joy the child experiences when he or she realizes, "Mommy and Daddy understand me!"

The child's ability to speak these simple words does not signal his or her readiness to present a thesis, nor do the parents expect such. They are pleased and satisfied with the sound of their names for now.

When the Christian seeks to learn how to pray, where does he or she turn if not to Christ Himself?

"Lord, teach us to pray..." - Luke 11:1

Jesus knew the joy that both the Father and we would experience with these first words:

“When you pray, say: Father, hallowed be your name, your kingdom come." - Luke 11:2

We all face troubles, some pain, loss, or other suffering. These are moments when it's hard to know how to pray. In our suffering we may feel like little helpless children, struggling to form the right words.

Jesus understands this as well. Suffering on the cross, in calling to God the Father, Jesus uses the word, "Abba." As I have written about before, this is the word that little children used for their fathers; "Daddy!"

Assignment for the day: Say those first words of the Our Father, but use the word "Daddy."  "Daddy, hallowed be your name, your kingdom come." Reflect on that and the joy that it gives to God to hear your voice speaking to Him, blessing His Name. I bet you say it more than once.

Learning to Pray (An Introduction)

"For me, prayer is a surge of the heart; it is a simple look turned toward heaven, it is a cry of recognition and of love, embracing both trial and joy." - Saint Thérèse of Lisieux

"What is absolutely essential to the Christian life?"

I suspect most Christians, should they ponder this question for even a brief moment, would conclude that prayer is essential to the Christian life.

I bet there have been many times you've heard (or said) "I would really like to have a better prayer life." For the Christian, what is really being said is "I seek to have a better relationship with Christ."

I propose that regardless of the state of our own personal prayer life, there is always room to grow and improve. For if Christian prayer is relationship with Christ, does the true Christian not seek to constantly and continually grow and improve that relationship?

While we may seek a better prayer life, we may often find ourselves to be inadequate or "dry". We might set out with some plan that soon thereafter falls by the wayside. Why is that?

Perhaps it is our misunderstanding of Christian prayer at the very basic and fundamental level. Do you think that prayer is all about words?

Does a baby understand it is loved by its parents? How is that? Do you think it is because the baby understands its parents when they tell him or her "I love you"? Of course not! The baby understands that the parent loves him or her because of the parent's actions!

Ah, the baby's ability to understand that it is loved begins with the actions of the parent. As the baby learns and grows, the relationship between baby and parents grow too. The baby learns to express it's love for his or her parents in ways that they most certainly understand. This is true long before the baby is able to express such affection through verbal communication.

Think of yourself as that baby and God as the parent. We know how to do this! It is at the core of our being, and that should be a comfort to anyone who thinks, "I don't know how to pray."

Kendra and I recently went on a Marriage Encounter weekend. On the second evening of the weekend while Kendra and I were reflecting on the day, we discussed one of the presenting couples. "Have you noticed how Judy looks at Ron?" I asked. "How couldn't I?" Kendra responded.

We went on to discuss some of the little ways that each member of the presenting couples had displayed love and affection for each other. These were all non-verbal means. They were each able to visibly express their love for each other to one another and to us without saying a word.

If our prayer is relationship with Christ, then we are able to understand His love through non-verbal means. We are able to express our love to Him through non-verbal means. Others are able to visibly recognize our relationship with Christ through such means, and this all works toward some benefit in the salvific plan of God.

Assignment for the day: Think of someone special in your life today. That person is a gift from God to you; a non-verbal means of His communication to you. Think about that gift today - and smile.

There, you did it! What a nice little prayer.

Time to Lent Up! What's Your Plan Look Like?

A former manager (and an old friend whom I miss) used to say, 

"If you want to be successful, you have to follow this outline:

• Know your goal. 

• Make your plan. 

• Write your plan.

• Work your plan.

• Review your plan daily.

• Never give up."

Ash Wednesday will arrive in less than 5 days. If you're reading this, you cannot use the excuse that it caught you off guard.

Don't wait til the last minute, quickly coming up with "something to give up or do for Lent" just as a formality or out of obligation. You're much better than that and certainly are called to be much better than that.

I encourage you to "Lent up" this year. Take your Lenten journey to the next level, whatever level that may be. Stop eating the "baby food" of your Faith when there's an unbelievably satisfying banquet that awaits you.

You know what I mean, so I won't even put the guilt trip on you by actually stating that lame thing you keep repeating every Lent. The one that is your "go-to". 

Let's face it. If it was that tough, you wouldn't keep choosing the same thing over and over. If it was something that really edified your Faith, you would have quit it all together (if it's a "give up " thing) or would have continued it regularly (if it's a "going to do" thing).

While you pray about this, thinking about what your plan will be, keep in mind what the purpose of Lent is in the first place.

Right, plan. Make a plan, not just a quickie item or two. Consider a combo: Give up something and utilize the savings (financial or time) on something good or spiritually constructive.

Perhaps an outline of your plan could be:

• I recognize A as being something in my life that I struggle with or that is holding me back from having a more meaningful relationship with God, so I am going to eliminate A from my life.
• I recognize that B would be something that I could really use or do that will help me grow spiritually or with my walk with God, so I am going to add B to my life.
• Additionally, I see X as something in my life that I enjoy. I see Y as a need that my church or someone else has. X is not necessarily "bad" for me, but by eliminating this particular thing from my life during Lent, I  can use the money (or time) that I usually spend on X to give to Y.

While this is just one suggestion of what your plan outline might look like, feel free to use it for yourself. You just have to fill in A, B, X, and Y.

Of course I don't mind telling you that first, your goal should be to become more like Jesus.

Then write your plan down. Look at it. Read it over. Know it.

When Lent arrives, you will be immediately ready to work your plan. Do what you set out to do.

No matter how much you think you know your plan, review your plan daily. Reviewing it visually once you have put it into practice may help you to see things that can be modified to help you achieve the goal you have set.

If you falter or mess up, don't give up. Pick yourself up, dust yourself off, and start again. Never give up. 

God never gives up on you.